911 The Sequel

911 the Sequel.                                                              3/20/14

It’s been 17 days and two stints since my last Cardiac Infarction. I am very grateful to God and his power to keep me alive and sane through this ordeal. The following is some of the lessons I have learned and some character building skills I have used going through it.

I was told I have a strong heart and that all my other arteries are 100% fine. The meds I am on are another matter.  One of them has given me the hives. I have never had hives or any other allergic skin reaction for that matter so this is all new to me. So out I went and bought a bottle of Benadryl Anti-itch gel . “Ah, that feels so much better!”  My second time in the hospital was just as good experience as the first. The "Cardio Staff "are wonderful! Things that I have learned since I was in the hospital are too numerous to mention, but here are a few tid-bits.

I learned that training new EMT’s takes place in the ER. While I was being admitted the nurse came in and told me he was training this new EMT on how to install an IV into the arm artery. I said, ‘Sure no problem!”  So as this new guy was trying to find my vein, I hear him muttering, “Oh you have great veins!”  For some reason all the nurses kept complementing me on how big my veins were. I secretly think they have a vein fetish or something. Anyway, he kept thumping my arm to get it to pop, then pressure, then pain, then I heard, “Oh Shit!” Hu? He yelled at the nurse, I can’t stop the bleeding! Yes, folks everyone wants to hear THAT in the ER. They finally got it under control. But I felt SO sorry for the new guy. He spent the next half hour cleaning up my blood off of him, off of me and off the floor. I kept thinking, “I hope there are no vampires around, I’d be a smorgasbord!” He left and walked back by, then he walked by again, and then he came in again and said, “I still have to clean up so more”. I said, “oh where now?”, and he said, “I saw that I missed some on your arm”.  That was so thoughtful of him! We all have to go through a learning curve and that must be the hardest profession to do so. I would have preferred not to have been his subject of training though. Hey, maybe I can get a discount off the bill?! 

I had to keep telling myself that, Yes, the doctors and nurses do know what they are doing and that they do not need my help in controlling the situation. “Lord, help me to except the things I cannot change…..”

I learned that while sleeping, I like to wrap the IV tube around my neck and then around my Legs. That was a fun one to get out of. I also learned I can still sleep soundly while EKG and IV machines go off sounding high pitched siren beeping sounds, I think this was thanks to the Norco they gave me.  I have also come to realize that I am hopelessly uncoordinated when it comes to putting on those hospital gowns with all the buttons, snaps and ties. I think the nurses were secretly amused at this because they liked fixing me up back there. Hey!  I have a nice butt! And apparently nice veins too, who knew?

My last experience was Norco induced for which I am not responsible for the outcome.  Every night around midnight the nursing staff changed shifts. And every night they would wake me up and introduce me to the new nurse. The last night I was there, I was having body aches and flu like shivers, (Extra Norco please!) and in walked the homeliest nurse I had ever seen. I thought, “Well all my nurses up to that point were all very good looking. I guess there had to be a homely one in the bunch.” But she was so big and brawny, that she scared me. Think, “Dwayne Johnson, the Rock”. I mean really this girl could break me in half! When she came over I backed down in the bed and said, "Please be gentle!" Then she said, “Hi, my name is Ron and I will be your new nurse this evening.” RON!? He was great and I am glad he saw me through the night. And no, I do not think he would have enjoyed fixing my gown.

Now that I am on the other side of a mild cardiac infarction, I am out warning everyone to get checked. If you are experiencing any weird aches and pains go get them checked out. Especially if you have a family history of heart disease and are over the big “Five O”. Now that we are all “Covered Californians” we should not have any excuses. Yea Right....